Emotional and Social Intelligence is a combination of skills that the most “tactful advisors, diplomatic officials, effective negotiators, and charismatic  entertainers” have mastered, according to Daniel Goleman, the leading expert in Emotional and Social Intelligence.

People who have a high emotional quotient (EQ) and social quotient (SQ) achieve superior performance, and their personal and professional relationships thrive, surpassing people with high IQ’s.  A person can be brilliant yet if they lack the ability to accurately read other’s emotions, manage their own emotions, or build alliances, their potential is severely limited.

Emotional Intelligence is intrapersonal awareness, awareness of oneself.  The 5 core competencies are:

  1. Self-awareness – the ability to recognize your thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and their effects.  This increased awareness enables you to understand why you think, feel and act the way you do.  With this understanding, you have the ability to change and improve.
  2. Self-regulation – the ability to control moods, emotions and impulses. This ability to manage internal states enables you to respond calmly in high pressure situations, be more flexible and adaptable, and increase positivity.
  3. Motivation – the ability to elict eagerness, drive, and ambition to initiate tasks, accomplish goals, and overcome obstacles.  This ensures smooth and timely, implementation and execution of tasks, goals and professional development.
  4. Empathy – the ability to feel what another feels.  We are wired to be social and connect with others.  The more we connect, the more we feel a sense of purpose, satisfaction, and meaning.
  5. Social skills – the ability to manage relationships and build networks.  This is part of the next branch, Social Intelligence.

Social Intelligence is made up of two domains:

Social Awareness is interpersonal awareness, the awareness of others. The 4 core competencies are:

  1. Primal empathy – the ability to perceive nonverbal feelings and behaviors of others.
  2. Attunement – the ability to be fully be present, mentally and emotionally to a colleague, audience or group.
  3. Empathetic accuracy – the ability to accurately perceive and understand the nonverbal feelings and behavior of others.  Examples include reading a group’s emotions, recognizing and anticipating customer needs, sensing the needs of a director or conductor during a performance.
  4. Social cognition – is how we process and apply social information.  These mental processes  – thoughts, perceptions, attitudes – determine how we behave in the social situations.  Examples include deciding the best manners at a dinner party, effectively interacting with the most powerful person in the room, forming alliances, or understanding why a remark was insulting rather than funny.

Social Facility is the application of interpersonal awareness.  The 4 core competencies are:

  1. Synchrony – the ability to read nonverbal cues instanteously and act on them smoothly and automatically.  This involves being skilled at the previous 4 core competencies.
  2. Self-presentation – the ability to present oneself effectively.  This includes charisma, poise and the effective expression of emotions to lead, entertain or motivate.
  3. Influence – the ability to shape the outcome of social interactions.  This can involve building and leading teams, navigating and resolving disputes, getting the lead part in a big role or acquiring VC funding.
  4. Concern – the ability to care about other’s needs and acting accordingly.  People who act with concern can climb the ladder of achievement making friends rather than enemies.  Concern cultivates a mindset of “we”rather than “me,” inclusivity rather than exclusivity, and taking actions with the greater good in mind.  This leads to greater satisfaction on the road to success and peace once the goal is achieved.

For more information contact Coach Kiomi today and schedule your free consultation.

Social and Emotional Intelligence Coaching provided in Seattle, Bellevue and Online.

As a supervisor needing the approval of others and avoiding conflict is a problem.  Being well aware of this I sought Kiomi’s assistance to find solutions. During our coaching meetings I learned a great deal about myself. With this knowledge I have become more adept at dealing with conflict, managing difficult staff and take criticism constructively.  My confidence has improved which has had a positively impacted my performance.  Thanks Coach K!
Tony W., Supervisor